Search
  • Cynthia Fortlage

Acceptance without Understanding™ - Friendship


One of the many things I do is coaching. I did this in my day to day executive role. I do this in my volunteer experiences. I do this for small business owners. I do this for young professionals, especially young female professionals as it is a category that is under-represented in business and boardrooms.


Recently one of these professionals shared with me their own use of acceptance without understanding.


They explained that when evaluating friendships, they take a look at how a friend handles any news related to them, a true friend accepts without understanding. A friend or casual friend will seek to understand. Often criticizing a decision. Asking questions that make you doubt yourself, or second guess a decision you made. They are not living your life!


I recall something my ex-father in law used to say in jest, everyone brings me joy, some by coming, others by going!


Isn't it so true that we feel it's our duty as friends to help someone lead a better life by questioning those decisions they make that perhaps we aren't brave enough to make our own decisions on?


It seems simple, but aren't a lot of truths in life just that simple. A true friend will accept your decision and do what they can to support your success.


As I recall discussions in the boardroom, there is truth to that. We can disagree and argue our points respectfully in the boardroom, but once the group makes a decision even if it is counter to your position when you walk out of that boardroom door you are unified in accepting the decision as a group decision and take that forward. You do not undermine that decision by always touting your decision as to the one that should have been.


So when you reflect on friendships or relationships in general, do they build you up by accepting your decisions and supporting you in such a way that ensures as much of your success as possible. Or are they destructive relationships that value understanding first and acceptance later, perhaps only when you see it from their point of view?


Just know this lady accepts you and encourages you to surround yourself with others that accept and build you up!


How do you decide whom to surround yourself with?


Con Amor Y Abrazos de Colombia, Cynthia

17 views0 comments