I’ve got a podcast interview today that’s a bit different from the usual one. Instead of focusing on my work, we’ll be diving into what makes me ‘me’—beyond the professional layers. One question they often ask is about the books, music, or films that have influenced me. My first thought was How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie. For someone who once struggled to truly connect with people, that book was pivotal in my early years. The skills I took from it helped me grow my career, eventually to the point where I was leading in the C-suite.
But as I thought about where I am now, a different book came to mind—Flowers for Algernon by Daniel Keyes. I first read it in middle school, so it’s been 35 to 40 years since then. Yet, even after all this time, it’s incredible how much the story of Charlie Gordon has stayed with me. Charlie’s journey, particularly his struggles with worthiness and acceptance, resonates now in ways I hadn’t fully appreciated before. It’s funny how these things work: as I reflected on his story, I began to see how those themes had quietly influenced me, helping guide my journey toward authenticity and the work I do today.
In Flowers for Algernon, Charlie believes that gaining intelligence will finally make him worthy and that it will bring him the acceptance and validation he craves. For him, worthiness is tied to meeting society’s external expectations, something many of us have experienced. He equates being “better” with being “worthy.” But as Charlie gains intelligence, he realises that external validation is fleeting and often conditional, leading to more isolation than connection. Early in my own career, I held a similar belief. I thought that climbing the career ladder and ticking the boxes of success would lead to self-worth. While this external success helped shape my professional path, over time, I saw its limits.
The real shift began when I moved from trying to meet others’ expectations to defining my own sense of worth from within. For me, this realisation marked a turning point, though it was just the beginning of an ongoing journey. It’s something I still work at regularly, what I call “deep work,” as I examine and strengthen my sense of inner worth. This work has taken on layers over time, moving beyond career milestones and external measures to foster a deeper acceptance within. Flowers for Algernon speaks to this need, showing that self-worth truly begins to flourish when we embrace ourselves independently of others’ approval.
My Guiding Mantra, "Acceptance without Understanding"
While Charlie’s story remains rooted in seeking external validation, we have the opportunity to look inward. This shift from external to internal worth is an empowering step, and it’s at the core of the work I do today. My guiding mantra, “Acceptance without Understanding,” embraces the idea that we are all inherently worthy—not because we meet a certain standard, but simply because we are. This mantra is about welcoming ourselves and others without needing to fit a predefined mould. It’s a journey from relying on others’ approval to building our own sense of self-worth, free from judgment. In this way, Charlie’s journey has helped me realise the importance of nurturing acceptance within, not only for others but for ourselves.
Charlie Gordon’s journey reminds us of the pitfalls of a world focused on external validation, but our journeys can move beyond his experience. We have the power to reclaim our worthiness as an internal, unwavering truth. In choosing self-acceptance, we create a foundation of self-worth that no one can take away. As we each reflect on our journeys, I hope this story serves as a reminder that worthiness isn’t something to earn—it’s something we carry within us. With Acceptance without Understanding as our guide, may we see ourselves and each other through the lens of intrinsic worth, beyond the limits of societal expectations."